Random Musings Ramblings Stories Title Goes Here
Monday and Tuesday were my first days as a Stay At Home Dad (The Sequel). Emily is back to work now, and the kids are only in daycare three days each week, and suddenly, as many have been before, I am left to my own parenting devices. This time around, though, it’s not as easy as just tossing a kid into a backpack and going to fun places, or getting chores done while the kid sleeps.
Or is it?
Let’s see. Monday I packed the kids up and drove to the San Francisco Zoo in the rain. The clouds parted, I tossed Adrian in the backpack,
and Erin led the way into the zoo and the family farm area where, because it was raining earlier, she had the entire place to herself (apart from) some scary, WE-CAN-READ-YOUR-THOUGHTS, sheep.
Eventually the rain returned and an impending nap time forced us out of the zoo, so we packed up and went home for a couple of hours. A fun time was had nonetheless.
After naps (for everyone) it was time for swimming lessons for both kids. How can a dad alone change two kids and himself in a changing room in time to go to lessons? How can a dad swim with his infant son while his toddler daughter takes her small group lesson when she has a tendency to just launch herself into open water and dad is usually sitting within arm’s reach to drag her up? I wasn’t really worried, but I’m hardly ever worried. Even when I don’t know what I’m doing I act like I do. Also, Erin and I talked a lot about how she has to sit on the step in the pool when her teacher is with another kid. We talked so much about it that I kind of hesitate to move from any steps I’m occupying myself. We talked so much about it that Erin didn’t budge from her step at all that day unless her teacher called to her for her turn. I was utterly proud of her, and of us, for executing what was probably the smoothest lesson/change maneuver we’ve ever done, and we did it all with Adrian further complicating the picture.
(The trick is to get a towel on her, dry him off and change him, then buckle him in his carseat while drying her off, and then, if your prayer for a miracle is granted she will sit still long enough for you to get dried and changed yourself and then you can emerge from the locker room as if it is the easiest thing in the world to do, prompting one of your mom friends to say “I don’t know how you can do this with two!” A brief swell of pride, and a quick switch to ‘casual dismissal mode’ will allow you to say “Ah, this is nothing. You should have seen me take them both to the zoo earlier today.” And scene.)
That…was Monday.
Tuesday I got both kids out of the house with me by 9am, started a laundry cycle at the laundromat with both of them in tow, drove down to a different city to drop off some boxes, returned to the laundromat to move the clothes to the dryers, took the kids out to a late breakfast (or, in Erin’s case, second breakfast), then returned to the laundromat to fold the clothes while the infant fell asleep in his stroller and the toddler rearranged the laundry baskets. This all worked because I thought very hard about the timing of it all before I began the maneuvers (I say “maneuver” a lot, because sometimes you just have to be a bit of a tactician when you have the kids), and it could have failed, fantastically, if I’d been off by even ten or twenty minutes. As it was we never let our laundry just sit in a machine, and we returned home in time for lunch, some play time, and a nap before I started dinner.
That…was Tuesday. (Not as full as Monday, but not exactly sitting around eating bonbons either.)
Wednesday was a school day for all of us. The kids went to daycare and I tried to get some work done around the gym and co-oping. I did okay. I’m a better SAHD than student at this point, though.
Thursday was a day for feeling like crap, so I did.
Friday was a day for getting over myself and getting some work done, so I did, though again, without the kids my motivation to get things done is severely diminished.
Saturday was a family outing to the Children’s Discovery Museum in San Jose. Erin explored; Adrian hung out in the backpack looking around at things.
During naptime I did some work at a house we’re trying to move into before the kids are in high school (and where I’d dropped the boxes during laundry time on Tuesday). I sold an oven to a guy off of Craigslist (after also completing flooring and water heater sales earlier in the week with people who did not, in fact, chop me up into little pieces and who paid in cash), and then tore out some closet doors and a little framing so that our new floors can extend into those closets smoothly instead of being broken up by a door frame. It will look sweet. If we ever live there. Which…well, there’s a very long story I’m not prepared to share just yet. I’ll keep it as a mystery.
Saturday night was Everybody Get a Little Sick night. So we did.
Sunday was Pumpkin Patch Day and we’d been promising Erin that she could wear her costume at the Pumpkin Patch all week long and we’d already planned to meet up with three other families in a sea of rotting squash and flu season snot. So we went….
And whose kids are cuter than these two?
Erin’s been talking about her Woody costume for nearly two weeks now. We made the mistake of letting her wear it on a couple of different nights and of course she snapped a piece of the lacing wrapping the brim of her cowboy hat. So, I dug around for some kind of tape or glue or something and despite having a junk drawer that is so full of crap that I can barely get it open we only have packing tape in the house.
So, there’s packing tape holding that hat together. But you can’t tell just by looking unless someone points in out to you. Hey, look over there!
See you next week. And Happy Halloween!
27 comments
You make some gorgeous kids there, coz. And holy hell you are a busy guy.
Memo to me: be less lazy.
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What a sweet family photo at the end. Good for you getting out and about. I love taking my kids to the zoo too. I was so impressed with myself that I took all three of them by myself when the baby was just 2 months old.
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You know what I did most of the week? Nothing! Zip. Zilch. Nada. My kids were gone. My husband was gone. I never turned the TV on. I didn’t cook for anyone. I didn’t help with homework I didn’t understand. It was bliss. I highly recommend it.
Then I loved on them hardcore when they got home. Well, not my husband. He’s hacking and sporting a zombie face mask. I don’t need that business.
Glad you didn’t get chopped up. It would have been a shame to miss all the cute kid action you just brought.
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Ok, wow. You are clearly a better mom than I am. I’ll second Loralee’s note to self.
Buzz and Woody look fantastic!!
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That first photo, where Adrian is reaching out to touch your face, is just so cute!!
You’re a great SAHD. It’s not an easy job, but you sound like you’ve got it all figured out. Take the good with the bad, and don’t whinge about the bad. Love the “Saturday night was Everybody Get a Little Sick night. So we did.” and then you just left it at that.
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Your family is beautiful. You seem to have the two kid thing wired. I have to tell you though … I did great until the THIRD came around. Ha!
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You know, if it was me that I had to take both kids to swimming lessons by myself, I’d be freaking out, I’d be majorly stressed before getting there, I’d be having some kind of panic attack when we got there, and no doubt I would lose my shit while we were there.
My husband, who did take them once to swimming lessons by himself, just shrugged and got on with it and didn’t really care about the stress.
Good on both of you. I need to chill out.
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Your kids made me tear up. They are seriously cute Shawn. Love the costumes! xo
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What a great family pic! Happy Halloween!
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Sounds like you’ve been busy with those two cute kiddos =) I love the family photo!
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You make is sound so easy! I’m seriously impressed.
Though I don’t have it down the way you seem to (yet) nor am I as brave as you (swim lessons?!), I did have the thought the other morning that I’m enjoying the juggling aspect of having two. But I only have to worry about mornings and some weekends by myself.
Those costumes are so adorable!
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foks often comment to me when I’m out with both boys that I’m Brave and Doing a Great Job and they Don’t Know How I Do It, and I kind of just laugh to myself because most times I’m barely holding the show together.
That said, you seem to be doing a great job, and that’s a gorgeous family photo. And Jesus Christ, how old is Emily? Did you take a child bride or something?
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foks often comment to me when I’m out with both boys that I’m Brave and Doing a Great Job and they Don’t Know How I Do It, and I kind of just laugh to myself because most times I’m barely holding the show together.
That said, you seem to be doing a great job, and that’s a gorgeous family photo. And Jesus Christ, how old is Emily? Did you take a child bride or something? By which I mean she looks fantastic, of course.
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What a gorgeous family!
Sounds like you’ve got your hands full with a toddler AND an infant, but they’re so cute, I’m sure it makes up for any difficulties.
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You forgot to mention that the mom friend at swimming also sent her kid into the changing room with you…so for a while, you had three kids. Sorry ’bout that.
My first comment!
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Sound like you’re doing the juggling act pretty well. Now…..add in four more kids for home daycare and you will have the first ten years that I was a SAHM.
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OK you can stop making me look bad now. Really. Seriously. I totally mean it! It took me two months to get a routine down after my son was born. We did good until he started moving and outgrew the infant car seat. The kid won’t sleep anywhere but his bed now. I can’t get my act together in the morning quick enough to get out of the house before his morning nap. Then he wakes up and I have to make lunch and clean it up and then it’s nap time again. Then he wakes up and it’s time to get dinner going then the dishes then it’s about bedtime. In the off chance I do get out of the house to grocery shop, my four year old daughter complains that she wants to go home. When we don’t go anywhere she complains she tired of staying home all the time. What a vicious cycle! Either I need to get lessons from the school of parenting you went to or I need a personal assistant to help me get my act together.
P.S. Taking them both to swim lessons at the same time, now that gives me something to strive for!
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I have to say that I really dislike comments like, “how do you do it?” and “good for you taking two kids to the zoo!” to random dads because I find it to be, well, rude. Of course a dad can contain/dress/entertain two children just as well as one, just like most moms can. None of us (man or woman) really have it together, do we? But I have never seen someone comment the same kind of comment to a mom.
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Just reread my comment and I’m afraid it sounds more rude than the comments I was talking about! I did NOT mean to sound like you don’t have it together, or your not doing a good job. I should have thrown a compliment in there– sorry ’bout that.
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Damn dude you are one busy dad.
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Your post is making me miss home. My adopted home of the Bay Area, that is. I don’t like to admit that I’m actually from Stockton.
Oh wait…..did I actually write that? CRAP! Um…..I wrote that wrong! Yeah! I’m not from Stockton, CA! I’m from…..um…..Fort Stockton, TX! YEAH! That’s it!
I’m completely envious though, and not just for where you live. You got so much more done last week than I did. I managed to cross off two (count ‘em one-TWO) items on my to do list. You rock! And I love the pumpkin patch pics. So cute!
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My daughter had the same costume about 6 years ago…I always wondered where it went! LOL
you have a beautiful family…
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Awwww, such a sweet photo at the end! I was a bit worried you were one of those crazy parents who dress up too! I mean not that there’s anything wrong with that because you totally could have pulled off Stinky Pete!!
Happy Halloween!
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We have a little Woody this year too! And, by the way, tell Emily she looks great!
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Great costumes! I love the family pic.
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Just a hard earned piece of advice from a mom who is well-seasoned in the two kids at the swimming pool thing.
Wrap them both in a towel. Hand them a snack or a toy and get dressed first. This is essential for preventing the experience of getting out of your swimwear and discovering that your child has left the changeroom. Not that I’ve ever run screaming through a community centre in wet hair and a towel. Nope.
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